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NYPTARDED

The word is out, the new Police Commissioner of the world's largest police force is 'tarded. 2 hopeless idiots are dead of bat shit inhalation after using guano to fertilize their home crops. A lifelong New Yorker (more or less) gets shoved onto the subway tracks, suffering a spinal fracture. 14 will get you 16, if you know what I mean. No Luigi coverage this week, all bloody and weird crimes from beneath the fold, dead in the tragic pages of NYC's tabloid press.

Dec 21st, 2024

Recently Added

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Dec 16th, 2024

Queer Shoulder Behind the Canadian Wheel

Penny for our thoughts? (hint: WE AREN'T REAL HAPPY!). We're so ticked off it's crazy, and we're really discouraged too! GOD!
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Dec 14th, 2024

THREE SLEEPY GIGOLOS

Congratulations Daniel Penny, thank you President Trump. Looks like that bitch wife of Tim Walz was right, time to TURN THE PAGE! Sean Combs continu...
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Dec 06th, 2024

Deny, Defend, Depose

Some details on the firearm used to murder an insurance CEO in a "brazen, targeted attack." In a word, this murder is some insane shit, white-on-white...
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Nov 29th, 2024

FOR THE CLICKS

Welcome back to New York City, where the grass is gray and the ass smells shitty. Yes, the ass smells worse there. A random stabber is nabbed, as is...
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Nov 15th, 2024

GRIZZLED

In the world of detectives, they don't come more grizzled (or more respected) than NIGHTWATCH DETECTIVE Pete Panuccio. The man has seen more dead bodi...
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Nov 10th, 2024

2w2f SPECIAL REPORT - RED MIRAGE

Your favorite liberals explain why you shouldn't worry. It's just a red mirage.
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Nov 08th, 2024

THE GOD SQUAD

THE HEAD OF THE GOD SQUAD IS A BOY-LOVING FRUIT. TRUMP HAS SOLVED THE PROBLEM. A WOMAN IS INJURED FROM TRYING TO SUBWAY SURF. TRUMP IS ON THE CASE....
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Nov 03rd, 2024

2W2F - SPECIAL (ALMOST) LOST EPISODE

Once thought lost forever, this episode emerges from the past to get its due. And just in time for the election, one of the most important ones, like...
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Nov 02nd, 2024

LIVE WITH SETH BARRON

Double and triple suicides, unethical gigolos and a dead artist.
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Oct 25th, 2024

Again with the kids damn

Three unbelievable NYC crime stories. Just watch.
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Oct 19th, 2024

NYCCR LIVE SOLO SHOW 1

Slashings and other criminal violence prevails in the city.
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Oct 11th, 2024

The Baby that Could Clog a Toilet

An unidentified man was slashed at the Dominican Day Parade. The cops look the other way on rape now, I guess. Manhattan DA Alvin Bragg mulls chargi...
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Oct 04th, 2024

The Prosecution Rests

Former federal prosecutor, now based political writer (TJHarker.com, https://www.tjharker.com/) drops by with some wild crime stories mixed in with re...
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Sep 28th, 2024

Hell wasn't built in a day

Retired NYPD NightWatch Detective Pete Panuccio appears to give his own background and inside perspective on this incredible event, the indictment of...
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Sep 20th, 2024

MARATHON FCKD

Our thoughts on Diddy, who is marathon fck'd. A crazy asshole steals and ambulance and wrecks it after a 30-min chase. 81-yr-old lady attacked, bu...